Teacher- kanjus bole to kaun

Teacher- Kanjus Bole To Koun

Student- Hum Chahe Jitne Bhi Msg Kare, Jo Uska Reply Na Kare Wo

T- Uski Ek Example Do

S- Sir, Apki Ki Pyari BETI

Teacher- ye kiska signature hai ...

Teacher-Ye kiska Signature he

"@@@@@@@"

Student-Meri mummy ka.

Teacher-aisa kaisa naam hai?

Student-Ji,wo unka naam hai "JALEBI BAI"

Early in the morning maa ne bete ko jagaya

Joke of the month

Early in the morning maa ne bete ko jagaya
Maa : uth jaa beta , school jane ka waqt ho gaya hai.
Beta: par kyon Maa ? Mai jana Nahi chahta .
Maa. Aisi do wajah batao jinke karan jana Nahi chahte
Beta: na bachche mujhe pasand karte hai aur na hi teachers.
Maa: oho , ye to koi baat Nahi hui. Chalo ab utho aur taiyar ho jao.
Beta: do karan batao ki mujhe school kyon jana chahte
Maa: ek to yah ki tumbled 52 saal ke ho aur doosara yah ki tum
Principal ho.

Aap murgi ho kya?

Student- Mam.. Aap Murghi Ho Kya?

Madam- Kya Bakwas Kar Rahe Ho

Student- Agar Nahi Ho To Humesha Mujhe Test Me Aanda Kyu Deti Ho

Incident of the decade

Madam- tell me 4 most eventful incident of this Decade..

Student-

1.Pappu Paas Ho Gaya
2.Munna MBBS Ban Gya
3.Munni Badnam Ho Gai
4.Sheela Jawaan Ho Gai

Dost nahi badlte

Result agar acha ho:
Teacher- Hoshiyar bacha hai
Maa-Bhagwan ki kripa hai
Papa-Beta kiska hai
DOST-Chal daaru pite hai

Result agar bura ho:
Teacher-Padhai mein dhyan hi nahi
Maa-Aag lage is mobile mein
Papa-Laad pyar ne bigaad diya
Dost-Chal daaru pite hain

B'day par
Maa-Jug jug jiye mera beta
Papa-Hamesha age bade
DOST-Chal daaru pite hain

Love me fail hone par
Maa-Beta bhul jao
Papa-Mard ban
DOST-CHAL DAARU PITE HAIN YAAR

MORAL OF STORY - Duniya badal jati hai but DOST kabhi nahi badalte.

Mai school nahi jaunga

School Ke Pehle Din Ghar Lautne Par Chimpu Bola, Mai Schl Nahi Jaunga.

Teacher Ko to Car Ki bhi Spelling Nhi Aati Maine Hi Unhe Bataya.

kya tum judwa ho?

Nayi Teacher ne School Join Kiya

Class me Usne
2 Bacche EK Jaise Dekhe aur Boli-Kya Tum Judwaa Ho?

Boys-Ji Nahi,

Hum Padosi Hai

Teacher ban jaunga

Teachar-Agar aise hi padhte Rahoge to kabi b kuch bhi nai kr paoge

Student-Jb Zindagi me kuch nai banuga to mai b apki tarah ek teachar ban jauga

Ye kya kiya

Ek Ladke Ne Exam Sheet Pe Potty Kar Ke Teacher K Hath Me Thama Di

Teacher-Ye Kya Kia

Ladka-Sir, Apne Hi Kaha Tha Ki Jo Aa Raha Hai Wahi Kar De

bazzae mein goliyan

Teacher: Translate – Bazaar mein goliyan chal rahi hain.
Santa: The Tablets are walking in the market.

Money Jokes

Taken from Money Jokes

A man being mugged by two thugs put up a tremendous fight! Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet. Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised thug said "Why did you put up such a fight?" To which the man promptly replied "I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in my shoe!"

---

A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would
there be any "we" in the first place."

---

What do you get if you cross a sorceress with a millionaire?
A very witch person.

---

Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire?
Sure. Here you are.
Thanks - but half the pages are missing.
What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?

---

Why is money called dough?
Because we all knead it.

---

Where do bees keep their money?
In a honey box.

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Why did the mean teacher walk around with her purse open?
She'd read there was going to be some change in the weather.

---

Fred collected lots of money from trick-or-treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate.
"You should give that money to charity," said the sales girl.
Fred thought for a moment and said, "No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity."

---

What happened when the cat swallowed a coin?
There was money in the kitty.

---

How can a can you double your money?
By folding it in half.

---

Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money.
"I'm not paying," said the duck. "I've only got one bill and I'm not breaking it."
"I've spent my last buck," said the deer.
"Then the duck'll have to pay," said the skunk.
"Getting here cost me my last scent."

---

Dad, would you like to save some money?
I certainly would, son.
Any suggestions?
Sure. Why not buy me a bike, then I won't wear my shoes out so fast.

---

I hate paying my income tax.
You should be a good citizen - why don't you pay with a smile?
I'd like to but they insist on money!

---

The best way of saving money is to forget who you borrowed it from.

---

Fred: Thank you so much for lending me that money. I shall be everlastingly in your debt.
Harry: That's what I'm afraid of!

---

Have you heard about the new aftershave that drives women crazy?

No! Tell me about it. It smells of $50 dollar bills.

---

Have you heard about the new aftershave that drives women crazy?

No! Tell me about it. It smells of $50 dollar bills.

---

At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars.

One of the chamber members stood up and said,

"I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army.

Answer ek hi hai...

Bahut DARD Hota he jab teacher bolta he ki tumhara or tumhare aage wale ka answer 1 hi he...
.
tab dilse aawaz ati he ki bhai mere sawal bhi to 1 hi tha :D

Answer same hai..

Bahut DARD Hota he jab teacher bolta he ki tumhara or tumhare aage wale ka answer 1 hi hai..

tab dilse aawaz ati he ki are o murakh... sawal bhi to 1 hi tha :D

Life of a student

Life of a student: PC hai,Net Nahi,
ATM He,Paise Nhi,
Cell He,Balance Nhi,
EXAM he,Tension Nhi
Padhna he,Lekin sala MOOD NAHI...

Answer correctly

Teacher: Whoever answers next qstn correctly they can go home. Suddnly a boy throws out his school bag
Tchr: who threw d bag?
Vikas: ME!

I'm going

Direct mzrketing

A Management Student
Hugs A Girl...
Girl: What's This ?
Boy: Direct Marketing. . .
*Girl Slaps The Boy*
Boy: What's This?
Girl: Customer Feedback..

Classroom clock

WORDS WRITTEN ABOVE A CLASSROOM CLOCK..

*

'This Clock will Never be Stolen,
Bcoz Too Many Students Are Watching it..!

Kya?..mai fail ho gaya..

Student Aapna Result Dekh Ke..

.

-Kya.. Mai Fail Ho Gaya..

Aur

Wo Bhi English Mai

..

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UNPOSSIBLE..

Submitted by:
Satish Raj Pathak

Note: For ignou assignments...
Visit
www.siteofindia.com/ignou.htm

Dost wo jo...

Takleef wo jo tadpa de
Teacher wo jo padha de

Mohobat wo jo wafa de
Dushman wo jo marwa de
Aur dost wo jo
Aaj "READY" dikha de
hai koi mera dost...